I just read the first chapter of "Falling in Truth" and I must admit - I see identical things that I went through with my first exposure.
I attended a congregation of ALL blacks (except for two white families and only a hand full of Hispanics). The experiences detailed in this one chapter - I can relate to. The gossiping about WHY a person was on public reproof (something that was ONLY to be known to the elders but EVERYONE knew it).
I suffered a lot with my association with the JWs. I never did get baptized but I was a publisher. The brainwashing they did on my daughter, to make her tell everything I did (from what time I got home from work to (and please, don't laugh - this is true) when I got my monthly cycle! When a sister contacted child protective services in reference to LIES my daughter told her, that was too much.
I stopped attending in 1998. Only went to the Memorial in 1999 and was chastised for not making regular attendance.
I would be chastised for staying home when sick. Even after having surgery, those nosy sisters would come by and pronounce me well enough to attend. One sister, because I refused to let her nosy body go with me when I was having a surgical procedure, mentioned that I was lying about having to get surgery. I tell you....these folks are warped!
I do not bother with them, do not allow them in my home and just avoid them at all costs. I am now attending church services at a church which I am comfortable with. Nobody questions my goings and comings, my daughter is not a problem (she's an adult and no longer lives with me) and I feel "at peace".
I don't have to worry about people barging in unannounced or being chastised because I'm seen speaking with a male. I don't have to worry about nosy sisters riding around the block looking to see if I'm home or fussing at me when I go to visit family members who are NOT JWs. Whew, what a relief!
I'm glad you have made this available for folks to read. It is definitely the nightmare that many former JWs have lived.
--VJ
Hi V.,
Thanks for writing and sharing your thoughts on my book, and your experiences.
I agree with you whole-heartedly that it is a huge RELIEF to be unchained from the Watchtower! It's amazing, when we look back, how they tried to poke their noses into every aspect of our lives.
I am always happy to hear of people escaping their clutches. Congratulations! Celebrate your freedom every day!
Ignoring the JW's who come to your door is certainly a valid response. What I do, however, is hand them an
article I wrote about why I left. You never know: it might just wake someone up. The article
is "Why Not be a Jehovah's Witness" if you care to print it out and give it to any JW who comes to your door.
I would like to put your letter on my website (with just your initials). I think it would be helpful to those considering joining to see how life in the JW's really works. Let me know if I have your permission to do this.
--Steve
Yes, please feel free to use my letter. I hope that many eyes will "open" to the truth about the JWs. I have a good friend who is still under their clutches and suffers much. This organization is so "anti-women" that these sisters suffer in silence. I've seen abusive husbands in the congregation and they try to "boss" the single sisters around. Anytime you have an elder getting on you about your goings and comings as an adult female, something is terribly wrong. My OWN dad didn't bother into my affairs.
I was also encouraged to "get switches from the trees to discipline my kids". Just like in your story the abuse towards children. I was very angry for a long time, but I've moved on. I have not attended a "Memorial" in many years. Also, I grieve for the young people. They are just "trapped" in an unloving religion. Always being compared to others, always never having the opportunity to enjoy recreation.
This particular congregation I attended: they really had major problems. Attendance dropped drastically. There was a lot of fighting among the elders. They all were "power hungry men".
Some of the JWs had no respect for my authority as the head of my home. They would encourage my minor child at the time to disrespect me. When I told her to stay home one evening, right behind my back they came and got her. That's kidnapping! And I am aware of the nasty things that are being committed, the pedophiles, etc.
Thankfully, many are "awakening" and getting out of there. I do NOT see many in field service like I used to. I have yet to have two visits since I left and also have rarely seen them out in field service.
Take care and keep on telling the "truth".
--VJ
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